Is it just me? Or is television now 90% about everyday life instead of entertainment, escapism? Creativity and beauty?

Dunno about you but I don’t want to retire back to my super secret headquarters after a hard day’s revolutionary work, alongside the oppressed and gray ranks of human society and their spoon fed, media vetted, half formed opinions and lives and switch on the marvellous gift of television, the luminous portal for visual arts and creative minds only to be confronted with 3 hours of “Bin men unchained” or “Accountants – the fascinating truth”.

If the scale of documentary evidence that ordinary life is depressing isn’t depressing enough you of course have the mind frying opportunity to watch untalented, UGG Boot wearing hairdressers from Stepney wailing like napalmed cats on shows like X-Factor or Pop Idol in the desperate hope they might be able to slough off the shackles of real life and be worshipped like demi gods under the glow of their name in neon.
(Of all reality shows these are the worst and must be crushed in the revolution. Bringing about the death of music itself is a crime against the people and the earth – fuck global warming this is happening NOW)

Now as you should know by now I’m all for equality and the belief that every human is inherently equal but I’m fucked if I want to spend my evenings watching some cunt struggling desperately for self respect being beamed straight into my sacred space, my refuge, my home.

Would you invite these people into your houses to discuss the world and their views? NO!
Would you ask them to join your table in a restaurant to share their woes and hopes over steak and chips? NO!
Would you encourage them sing at your wedding/Birthday/Bar mitzvah? NO!!!

Why? Because you really don’t give a luminous, hair covered, flying fuck, you have your own life to think about.

I can admit that there’s maybe an iota of schadenfreude or in layman’s terms “wow thank fuck I’m me” to be had when exposed to these ham-fisted, vacuous globs of televisual excreta but that’s ultimately a depressing and dark place to be. Time is better spent celebrating yourself and life directly rather than propping up your already wafer thin self belief with an hour long assertion that you are a lucky fucker…no?

BUT…The real psychological danger of these programmes is far more sinister than just wasting your evenings when you could be doing something useful.

The underlying message that YOU, yes YOU are somebody special and can achieve anything you want, no matter if you are 74 years old, 26 stone and dream of being an Olympic pole vaulter, the daily assertion that television is your friend and is solely responsible for making you feel needed and worthwhile – IT WANTS YOU TO STAY IN YOUR CHAIR WHERE YOU ARE NO TROUBLE AND BUY INTO THE SYSTEM IT PRESENTS TO YOU.
It is, simply put - Cancer of the personality.

It’s more evidence comrades that the powers that be and their tentacled media henchmen want to erode your sense of reality, cocoon you into a cotton wool ball of corporate manipulation where they can predict your behaviour and spend less money on working around, or with, the individual free thinker who dares to question the established routine.

Switch off the TV, put Napalm Death’s “Distorting the Medium” on your IPod and go out of the house – There is the reality. It might look a bit shit but it’s yours and it doesn’t lie.

Wake up, Viva La Evolution!